Let's Fly! Five Moments of the Ignatian Examen

Wandering Albatross (Diomedea exulans) in flight, East of the Tasman Peninsula, Tasmania, Australia.

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REATH: The secret to flying is the wing. But it is no secret at all that air must first be present before anything could even exist, let alone take off and fly. We draw an analogy between the Ignatian examen and the secrets of birdlife and bird flight. Every bird relies on breathing in the air first to stay alive. Just like human beings, birds, as well as plants and fishes, are beings-with-breath. There is no genuine examen if we cannot become mindful of the basics. The basic awareness of being-with-breath directs one’s attention to the Spirit who is breath and life, the impetus for meaning who sheds light upon everything. Therefore, the examen is our constant awareness of being-with-Spirit. It is a daily bidding evoked by each breath that we take moment-to-moment. Every breath serves as the living lens to look in and recognize God’s Spirit who longs for us more than we long for God and is more alive in us than we are to ourselves. Without this Spirit, there is no drive even to get up from bed in the morning, let alone to be disposed for prayer. An ocean of air is strong as it pushes externally and internally from near and afar against anything, including us, even if we do not feel its full might. We drink its strength when we breathe. That is why the examen starts simply with one’s breath. It is a powerful way of disposing oneself to be full of the Spirit and life. The Spirit is to the examen as breath is to life. No wonder the words for Spirit, soul, life, and breath are synonymous in the major world languages. Human life is never solitary just like birdlife. Although a bird could be seen flying solo, it is never alone. My breath is like the “wind beneath my wings” that propels this quarter-hour mindfulness exercise. Just think of a hummingbird that whirs its wings so fast to steadily hold itself hovering in the air while it drinks sweet nectar from a flower. I ask, “Where is God alive in me?” “Where do I sense God’s living Spirit here and now?”

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XPERIENCE: We have said the secret to flying is the wing, so the secret of the examen is human experience with emphasis on human choices. Every human choice is prophetic. God, who longs for us more, already speaks to us and we respond to God through our everyday human choices. Both good and bad experiences become a part of who we are which function as our wingspan in navigating through life, e.g., human conscience, wings of thoughts, feelings, desires, actions, reactions, and inactions. The person that best fits a job is the one seasoned by experience, like a seasoned pilot, and there are no substitutes nor shortcuts to that. These are like the various shapes and types of feathers and muscles that grow on the bird’s arms, which, after years of experience, are given proper shape and form. A bird’s feathers are considered the most complex body structure found in any animal. They aid not only in flight but also in thermal insulation and in providing weatherproof shelter for the chicks. Each feather can have more than a million tiny branches called barbules. These barbules have hooks (hamuli) that tack the feather’s main branches together like zippers. So if the bird ruffles its feathers, it just strokes the feather with its beak to fasten the parts and it is back in perfect form again. A bird spends time each day assessing and grooming its feathers to ensure a hassle-free flight. Likewise, the examen is an assessment of the day through mindful scanning of the previous hours—remembering and catching with indifference thoughts, feelings, desires, actions, reactions, and inactions that arose. It is often impossible to cover everything in a short period so learn how to pick and choose. Ask yourself these questions to assess what was imagined, felt, said, done, or not done during the day, “Was it true? Was it necessary? Was it kind?” Ask for forgiveness from God.

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RESENCE: With both air and proper shape of wings, the flight might not still be possible without a third element called lift. It is a force that results from the interaction between the air and the wings. As the bird dives into the air it is pushed upward by air blowing over its body surface. As air blows above the wing, the body is lifted or held from behind through propulsion. It is likened to an invisible hand that lifts an animal aloft. At first, the bird might start exerting a lot of effort when flying. Just as in the examen, there could be a lot of challenges too at first. Birds experience being dragged down because of air currents and movements which ought to be listened to and obeyed when flying. It could be a rollercoaster of emotion, especially for the fledglings on their maiden voyage. But as the bird matures with more experiences of defying gravity, it gains greater familiarity with the air flowing between its thicker feathers and stronger muscles. A bird constantly changes the shape of its wings to steer through the air. It can even move single-wing feathers to change direction. There is the meeting of the minds between bird and air like two souls dancing in communion with joy. Such is the bird’s intuition which is like the interior knowledge that is deepened in every examen. A person, like a bird, knows when to make a downstroke, an upstroke, or other kinds of spiritual movements. But it requires a listening heart. A bird flaps its wings too fast that we cannot see all its movements. We are like that, living our lives mostly unmindful of where we are headed and at times risking injury to ourselves and our neighbors. The examen has already been done ever since human consciousness existed. There is an ancient dictum, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” The largest sea birds—the wandering albatross—circumnavigate the world three times a year. They only touch the ground to nest or to eat. Throughout their long lifespan, they are perpetually lifted being embraced by the air. Likewise, examining one’s life daily is central to living a healthy spiritual life sustained by God’s presence. No wonder St Ignatius of Loyola held the examen in the highest esteem. To skip a day without the examen is like being disconnected from God’s presence that embraces our entire body, mind, heart, and soul. To forget the Spirit’s interior movements is like a bird forgetting how to breathe and fly or how to commune with the air. It would be good to ask here, “Where did I encounter the uplifting presence of God this past few hours?”

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RATITUDE: A bird doesn’t have to flap its wings to stay aloft. When the Spirit is blowing freely and we are aware interiorly then it is time to just glide with the Spirit. When a bird glides, the wings go motionless. Gravity pulls the bird toward the earth, but air rushing over its body surface gives enough lift, so the bird drops gently. If the bird starts high enough in the air, it can glide at some distance, but eventually, it will need to flap its wings to climb again. But one does not need to fly away too high. With the help of sunlight heating open surfaces of the earth, currents of warm air called thermals rise. Birds use air currents to be lifted without flapping a wing. This, indeed, is a great consolation for a bird in the form of a free lift. Gratitude is not just thanking God for good things but a soaking-in of God’s goodness. A series of grateful examen of even just the little things that come will bring one deeply immersed in God’s greatest gift of Godself—the delight of God’s heart. Gratitude is like a sonar that detects the proper coordinates that connect and root deep within the source of consolations—the beginning. Meister Eckhart said, “If the only prayer you ever said was, ‘Thank You’ it would be enough.”

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URRENDER: It is good also to guard against two temptations, exaggerations or deceptions, i.e., the two no-fly zones. First is self-rejection—the greatest enemy of the spiritual life which contradicts the sacred voice that calls us the ‘Beloved’ (Henri Nouwen). Second is self-glorification—the greatest transgression which turns a person to become lukewarm and self-entitled. In Matthew’s parable of the talents, the lazy, lukewarm and irresolute are some of the most wretched of the damned (Mt 25:14-30). They are grounded or prohibited to fly because of skyjack. One of the promises of the Sacred Heart of Jesus is for lukewarm hearts and discouraged souls to become fervent, impassioned, or burning. We are not called to be lukewarm but to be either hot or cold (Rev 3:15-17), i.e., to a discerning and self-surrendering love of the Giver who is the source of life, consolations, good gifts and talents received. St Augustine said “My love is my weight.” Love alone is what bears weight in heaven; everything else is vanity, without weight or taste. This is linked to the true meaning of Ignatian “magis” or “more,” which does not mean ‘many’ but ‘much’ in relation to God who is always ‘more’ (Deus semper major). The human spirit is inflamed, spurred on by God’s ever greater love first and then the deeds will overflow from it. After getting a free lift from one thermal, a bird glides off to arrive at its destination “con grande animo,” with a big and magnanimous spirit ready-to-hand. This final part of the examen (also a new beginning) is a form of balancing, forward-looking and being led in the spirit of faith, hope, and self-surrendering love and commitment to the divine heart through, with and in Jesus Christ. Agape (divine love) is the “one thing necessary” (Lk 10:42) which is sufficient in life’s everydayness and everreadyness. I ask myself, “Where is this love leading me to stop, start, sustain or surrender after being immersed in God’s ever greater and unending love?” I conclude with an “Our Father.” Fr JM Manzano SJ